Thursday, November 1, 2007

New for P90X Lean: PlaChatQua

For all you fans of Core Synergistics, I'd like to present a new enhancement I created this week for Plank Chaturanga Run. Basically, you place yourself in plank position, begin the run, and just before you lower yourself into chaturanga, have a 5.6 earthquake throw you on your ass, make you wonder if you're drunk, and send you squealing like a weasel toward some uselessly perceived protection, like a doorway. Technically, it's called Plank Chaturanga Run-Like-Hell-It's-A-Quake!, but PlaChatQua is much more user-friendly.

For those of you not living in a quake zone, use this work-around:
- begin the exercise
- have a significant other or large pet kick you to the floor mid-plank
- play a pre-recorded message to yourself that proclaims you're going to die horribly OR will be subjected from this point forward to hourly updates on how Brangelina and the kids are doing, which will make you WANT to die
- spike your workout drink with Ex-lax so you crap yourself

Please note that this is not a Beachbody endorsed enhancement to the routine.

God, I miss tornado country.

1 comment:

mjs said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.